CRJ #4 - The Struggle of the Female Gender

Throughout my life, I have described myself as a tomboy in a proud manner. I explain how “I played many sports when I was younger and I so glad that I am not a prissy girl who takes an hour to get ready for dinner.” I never thought how demoralizing I was being to the female sex until completing this reading. In reality, my girl friends who I grew up playing co-ed softball and soccer with actually outplayed the boys many times. I remember the parents actually commenting how “cute” that was; they sometimes would joke with their sons but would never praise the females. I believe my experience is very representative of how Shaw and Lee describe that “the notions of femininity and masculinity…are socially constructed” (pg 124). I was even participating in this behavior without even realizing it. It reminds me of reading the results of my weight IAT test; I had a bias that I was unaware I was showing. As Judith Lorber would say, “everyone ‘does gender’ without thinking about it” (pg 141).

I also agree with Judith’s idea that children are molded to fit into this construction because of actions they see from their parents. I always wanted to be daddy’s little girl, and I got the most praise from my father when I was competing in sports. In a way, I had already learned that acting more like a boy would make my father proud. This is because “in a gender-stratified society, what men do are usually valued more highly that what women do because men do it” (pg 142). It’s strange because men count on women for so much: cooking, cleaning, taking care of children, and entertaining. It seems men should be kissing our feet and wanting to be skilled like us women. The exact opposite is seen though, as many of today’s idols are burly football players and rap stars. With the hopes of Hillary Clinton as President and Oprah as a role model, little girls ideas will at least begin to change.

I think that this trend is somewhat starting to turn around though. When I was in high school, boys were finally “allowed” to be on the cheerleading squad and to have their own volleyball team. Also, one girl I was good friends with petitioned hard to be on the men’s wrestling team and she succeeded. I remember not understanding why she was choosing this path and thinking she must be crazy; however, now I see she was truly courageous before her time. Hopefully, this proves that the foundation of this “social construction” may be breaking down with the new generations. The problem is that only young adults, without children, are beginning to learn the problems with how we treat our children. The generation before us thought that it was normal; however, we now know that society should be different. I think as the years continue, these young people have children, and more people are educated about the negative effects of creating stigmas such as a tomboy or a sissy, females will be able to compete with the male gender.